Rules of attraction

I'm always writing ideas in my spare time, and one day I'm going to meet that wonderful publisher or producer who's going to hear my ideas and give me a lot of money and motivation to finally write that book or screenplay. One of the ideas that I have played with for a while is a new dating book. I know the last thing that needs to be on the market is a brand new dating rule book, and lord knows I'm the last person who needs to be giving advice.

But I can say with confidence, now, that I may not know the rule to getting one, but I can recoginze an asshole in a second. I want to save women from getting into these dyfunctional asshole relationships, and believe me I have plenty of experience to back it up. In other words, I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you what not to do.

This is only a very partial list of tips/rules/advice that I came up with, so here is some in no particular order.

1. Don't by any means ever date a man in the military (except for the air force).
Military men are crazy, I don't know why but they are, and I'm not talking about former military, I'm talking about current ones. No matter how normal they seem, something is always very off about them.

2. If a man asks you out on a date, pay attention to how he asks and what day he asks you.
If only asks to see you, with no particular place picked out; he wants ass. If he asks you out in the middle of the week, and he cannot wait until the weekend; he's crazy. Lunch dates on any day of the week, or night dates on the weekend are pretty safe. But if he is so desperate to see you again, that he just can't wait that long, run like the wind.

3. Never by any circumstances ever date a man who doesn't like sports.
My mom told me that one, and it is in fact true. There are actually some men out there who do not like sports, and they are really, really weird. Not gay, but weird; which in some cases is worse.

4. If you truly like or click with a man within the first meeting, he is usually involved with someone, just broke up with someone, or married.
Men who are involved or just got over being involved have nothing to prove, no games to play, and no risks to take. So most of the time they are at ease, and themselves when they talk to you.

5. Be wary of fineness.
Fine men make you do crazy things, say things you don't want to say, perform acts you don't want to perform, they'll make you think they're smart when they're in fact really stupid. Ladies, we are just like men in this aspect. This comes from that little teeny bit of insecurity that is prevalent in all of us. And think about it, which would you rather have happen, your friends thinking your man is an idiot or your friends thinking your man is ugly. Well, stupidity can be hidden by closing one's mouth; unattractiveness is head on. You make the call.