I met guy. He's really nice, total perfect gentleman. So far we have had two lunch dates and one date to the Alicia Keys concert. He's fairly attractive, fairly smart, unattached but he's a little young acting. What's the problem you ask? I'm not attracted to him. And I keep trying to make myself.
You see, I am drawn to what I like to refer to as the "beautiful loser". Beautiful losers are really good looking men, who cannot seem to quite get their shit together finacially or mentally. Always down on their luck, always going through a hard time, always tortured. Can't quite ever figure out why life chose them specifically to receive shit end of the stick. Always beautiful. This formula has proved time and time again that it does not work for me. At all.
Did you know that the definiton of insane means that when someone does the same thing over and over again, hoping for the same result. Yeah, learned that on Ugly Betty.
I refuse to be one of those women who claim to be only attrached to "thugs", or "someone with an edge" or whatever. Its such bullshit. Basically all that means woman is attracted to someone who reinforces their own fucked up self-esteem. The relationship can't go anywhere but down. Trust me, I am an expert on this subject. It never works out.
Okay, so back to ol' boy. Not into him at all, can't really figure out why. He's a sweetheart, but he's a little young acting which is kind of a turn off, plus I have a million things going on in my mind right now, (such as my homelessness that will take place in about 2 weeks and the power bill I have to figure out how to pay) so I don't really know, Or lastly, but definately least is it because the sting from Mike still hasn't worn off yet, and I'm completely numb and don't even want to look at boys much less contemplate a relationship. Anyhoo, after lunch today, I decided I'm just going to be friends with him.
Its so funny how life works, I've been bitching about being single forever, and when the time finally comes where I am fully concentrating on handling my business, here they come.
I'd greatly appreciate some advice on this topic before I go into self-analyzation hell.
(Oh, did I mention he was in the miliary, for 8 years, yeah, that torpedoed that shit into friendship right then and there.)
