I remember back in the day, when I thought somebody was cute. I told them, right then and there. No rhyme reason or pretense. When they felt the same way, I attacked with about the same amount of discretion as a dog in heat. Now when a guy...excuse me...cute, normal looking guy with seemingly non-ambiguous sexuality, I wonder if he thinking, "wow, her hips are really wide, how does she find pants?"
I wouldn't even call it confidence per say, it's just what you did.
Now I think when you get a little older. Men see you of two ways. Either dateable/marriage material or umm, how can I say this...not. I believe that most women are born with just enough personality and feminity to always attract men and have them stay around for a while. Looks are not a factor in this formula. I've seen plenty of...erm, unconventional looking women..who always manage to be in a relationship and always have the upper hand. Bitches are included in this scenario, too. They always have a man,
Then there are the others. The undateables. The ones who upon sight have nothing physically wrong, or even nothing mentally wrong, but no guy will touch them with a ten foot pole because they just give off a certain vibe. My best friend says their losers. I think that's a little harsh. I just think that...hmmm...I really don't know how to categorize it.
I, myself, am beginning to believe I fall into the undateable category. Not because I have trouble meeting men, I just meet the wrong ones (please refer to the ambiguously gay post prior to this one.), the right ones just never seem to be attracted to me at all. And if I did manage to meet one, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't stick around and watch all the wonderful gay friends joining in to celebrate our lives with us. I mean, it will seriously take a strong hunk of man to sit through the gay pride parade to happens in my life every weekend.
So we'll see. I met a guy on Sunday who I gave my number to who I had no interest in talking to at all. I blame this on the fact that I don't have time, but it's bull shit. I do this a lot. I just don't want to waste my time unless it's somebody who I really want to call me. Anyhoo, I saw him at the gym today and gave me serious stank eye, I didn't figure out who he was until I was almost at home.
I going to try not to be alone forever. I promise.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Every Man in Los Angeles is a Fucking Douchebag.
It's true. They are.
I will elaborate.
I went bar hopping with my friend Vanessa on Saturday. I have at this point completely given up of meeting guys when I go out because they are not really interested in meeting women. They are not even interested in having one night stands, that would even be plausible. Single men in LA only like attention, and that's pretty much it.
The first bar we went to, me and my girlfriend were talking and some guy taps me on my shoulder and asks me what I'm drinking. He's clearly gay. I say margarita. He's drunk, and keeps talking as if maybe he might kind of be hitting on me. But never really makes it perfectly clear. Once again, gay. He rubs up against me, I confirm with my friend that homeboy is gay. I'm confused. No, not really. He's gay. And wasted. My girlfriend gets up and goes to the bathroom, he sits on the stool next to me and starts chatting. My friend comes back he asks us to join the party that's he's with so we can get free drinks. We get up...he runs off...we sit back down.
Another man with ambiguous sexuality comes up. We're about to leave, and we ask does he want our seats. He says no. Now the way LA clubs work in my opinion, it's either a bar where nothing but black people frequent, or not many black people at all. So it's not really a surprise to me anymore that if I go to a club and I'm the only black woman there. Ambiguous, wearing a shirt that says Santa Monica, looks dead at me and says, "Is this Little Ethopia?, You don't look Ethiopean."
Let's go.
We head to bar called the dime. It's packed. While making our way to the bar, I see a really cute dude who I intend to flirt with. After almost getting into a fight with a girl at the bar we sit down, and I asked his friend who looks and sounds a lot like Mike Tyson where he went. Friend took this as his in to proceed to tell me the hard road he's traveled in life. But he says it in a very Mike Tyson-ish way.
Cutie Pie sits back down.
Me: "So what part of LA do you live."
Cutie: "Nicholls Canyon."
Me: "Where?"
Cutie: "Nicholls Canyon, like LMFAO are my neighbors. Wanna see my pictures with Paris? We're friends."
Okay, let's go.
The last bar we hit included a drunken conspiracy theorist who wouldn't leave us alone, a model (who left early), and the worst corned beef hash I've ever eaten in my life.
I hope none of you are planning on moving here.
I will elaborate.
I went bar hopping with my friend Vanessa on Saturday. I have at this point completely given up of meeting guys when I go out because they are not really interested in meeting women. They are not even interested in having one night stands, that would even be plausible. Single men in LA only like attention, and that's pretty much it.
The first bar we went to, me and my girlfriend were talking and some guy taps me on my shoulder and asks me what I'm drinking. He's clearly gay. I say margarita. He's drunk, and keeps talking as if maybe he might kind of be hitting on me. But never really makes it perfectly clear. Once again, gay. He rubs up against me, I confirm with my friend that homeboy is gay. I'm confused. No, not really. He's gay. And wasted. My girlfriend gets up and goes to the bathroom, he sits on the stool next to me and starts chatting. My friend comes back he asks us to join the party that's he's with so we can get free drinks. We get up...he runs off...we sit back down.
Another man with ambiguous sexuality comes up. We're about to leave, and we ask does he want our seats. He says no. Now the way LA clubs work in my opinion, it's either a bar where nothing but black people frequent, or not many black people at all. So it's not really a surprise to me anymore that if I go to a club and I'm the only black woman there. Ambiguous, wearing a shirt that says Santa Monica, looks dead at me and says, "Is this Little Ethopia?, You don't look Ethiopean."
Let's go.
We head to bar called the dime. It's packed. While making our way to the bar, I see a really cute dude who I intend to flirt with. After almost getting into a fight with a girl at the bar we sit down, and I asked his friend who looks and sounds a lot like Mike Tyson where he went. Friend took this as his in to proceed to tell me the hard road he's traveled in life. But he says it in a very Mike Tyson-ish way.
Cutie Pie sits back down.
Me: "So what part of LA do you live."
Cutie: "Nicholls Canyon."
Me: "Where?"
Cutie: "Nicholls Canyon, like LMFAO are my neighbors. Wanna see my pictures with Paris? We're friends."
Okay, let's go.
The last bar we hit included a drunken conspiracy theorist who wouldn't leave us alone, a model (who left early), and the worst corned beef hash I've ever eaten in my life.
I hope none of you are planning on moving here.
Sunday, June 05, 2011
I Go to the Movies By Myself
I go the movies by myself, quite a bit. According to my best friend this is unusual, but I never really had a problem with it. I went to see X-men first class, yesterday (awesome, by the way) because I couldn't find any one to go see it with me, so I just went. Whenever I have a full day to myself, my favorite thing to do is to buy a ticket online, buy a hot dog, nachos, and an icee (and sometimes milk duds), pig out and go see a movie. My best friend thinks this is strange. Not strange in the way that is a unusual human behavior, but strange in the way that this ritual is the way I sort of celebrate my own alone-ness. A man friend told me once that a movie date is considered a romantic thing.... Really?
Are the movies really supposed to be considered a romantic thing?
I'm not sure, I've done quite a few unromantic things to men in movies.
And yes, the movies are full of couples, but I really don't understand it. Still at 32. Maybe I will eventually.
It's another thing to go to dinner by myself. That's sad, I am not doing that. That is just a spotlight highlighting your beacon of lonlieness. I mean you really get to know someone at dinner, their eating habits, what they like to eat, or the absolute make or break for me which is how well they tip. Bad tipper, no go. Plus, no restaurant in the world is that damn good that I would actually sit down and eat there alone with a room full of people, where instead I can just get it to go.
Are the movies really supposed to be considered a romantic thing?
I'm not sure, I've done quite a few unromantic things to men in movies.
And yes, the movies are full of couples, but I really don't understand it. Still at 32. Maybe I will eventually.
It's another thing to go to dinner by myself. That's sad, I am not doing that. That is just a spotlight highlighting your beacon of lonlieness. I mean you really get to know someone at dinner, their eating habits, what they like to eat, or the absolute make or break for me which is how well they tip. Bad tipper, no go. Plus, no restaurant in the world is that damn good that I would actually sit down and eat there alone with a room full of people, where instead I can just get it to go.
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