Sorry I haven't written very much. I know that this is supposed to be a dating blog, and I was really excited about the idea at first. The excitement quickly wanes when you realize that there is no material for you to write about. No experiences to draw on really to draw on to give invaluable, life changing advice. No men who really speak to you or pay attention to you. You know, the small things.
Here's an idea that you all can discuss amongst yourselves. Is it wrong that I stopped caring and stopped trying? Not necessarily in a give up on life sort of way, but more so in a it happens when it happens sort of way.
I'll give you just a little background. I've recently achieved a high state of clarity in a couple of weeks as far as my "personal" and professional life, and I have decided to surrender to my own epiphanies.
I don't know if I've ever talked about a co-worker that I had a crush on. Well, at least the one I thought I had a crush on. Anyway, I have to work very closely with this guy roughly for the last year and half. I thought he was the nicest, sweetest, guy ever, but he had a girlfriend. I knew that they were having problems, and I thought maybe, when they finally broke up that he would realize that I was the one that he wanted to be with all along and we would be together and ride off into the sunset.
Yeah, I was delusional as hell with that one.
I really have this bad habit of wanting people to like me who I don't necessarily like. He must lust for me in dreams at night all while I don't really give a shit about them one way or another. It's very narcissistic and self-involved, but it's such a boost to the ego.
This was the case with him.
Yeah, he has good qualities. But honestly I don't see myself waiting by the phone on baited breath for him to call me. He's funny, but he's not funny in the way that it plays off people. He's more "me, me, me, look at me" funny. Not cute, and gets old. He's short and kind of fat. I don't mind when guys are out of shape, but there are qualifications on that. If you're out of shape it needs to bother you a little bit, or because you're so busy focusing on other wonderful, meaningful things that you neglect things like your weight. Strive to be the best possible you. Basically if you're fat and say, "fuck it, I'm just big." I hate that.
He wouldn't be down with my sometime diva girl ways. At all. And he would hate my friends. He kind of talks at me and doesn't really have any interest in getting to know me on a personal level outside of work. I can go on.
I came to this conclusion when he actually broke up with girlfriend a couple of weeks ago, and I didn't care. Oh, yeah, and I'm leaving that job in two weeks. Still don't care.
Yeah, and I got a new job. Got off my ass, prayed, and got a new job. and I'm writing again, as evidenced here.
As far as dating goes, I saw someone I knew get dressed up to go out on date the other day. She seemed like she was going to have fun.
I'm so pathetic.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Dating in Los Angeles
It sucks. For me at least. And my friend. Let's call her Tammy.
Tammy and I have been friends for a couple of years now. She's in her early 30's like myself. She's blonde, petite, smart, very outgoing. And she has never had a boyfriend. At least for more than 5 months. She's originally from northern California and she's basically lived here since college. No boyfriend. All of her friends, (besides me of course) are all in relationships or married. They have even tried to fix her up with some of their friends. Nothing. We've been out to bars together several times. No one approaches us and when we talk to them... tumbleweeds.
Speaking of bars. Every time I go out in LA, everybody who comes in already knows each other, so there's really no mingling really. It's the same groups who come in together, stick together, and leave together. The guys may smile at you while their going up to get their drink, then they run back to their girlfriends. Who are hanging on to the bottom of their leg.
I say all this to say this. Everybody in LA is in these ridiculous long term relationships. I say ridiculous because some of the people who I see in long term relationships are quite ridiculous. Imagine seeing the weirdest sketchball guy ever in a department store, shopping, drueling at the mouth and you are totally afraid to go near him. He starts coming near you to ask you a question and you fear for your life. Now imagine yourself backing away and then his cute perfectly normal girlfriend comes upstairs and plants one straight on the mouth and they soon share a loving embrace, making you instantly wonder... what the hell did you wrong with your life?
Tammy and I always have this discussion when we go out. It's not necessarily about love. Love is a long shot. But we really cannot figure out what's wrong. We do not know why that we are the in-between relationship girl. The girl he needs to pass the time. Not the girl that the dude will eventually go running back to, but she won't take him back because she dumped him and has found someone better. We're the fun girl. We're also never the only girl.
I have a co-worker that just broke up with his girlfriend. I don't even think I like him, but yet I thought about pouncing on him solely because it's such a anomaly that he's single man.
Anyway, there will be a part two to this. I have more.
Anyway, there will be a part two to this.
Tammy and I have been friends for a couple of years now. She's in her early 30's like myself. She's blonde, petite, smart, very outgoing. And she has never had a boyfriend. At least for more than 5 months. She's originally from northern California and she's basically lived here since college. No boyfriend. All of her friends, (besides me of course) are all in relationships or married. They have even tried to fix her up with some of their friends. Nothing. We've been out to bars together several times. No one approaches us and when we talk to them... tumbleweeds.
Speaking of bars. Every time I go out in LA, everybody who comes in already knows each other, so there's really no mingling really. It's the same groups who come in together, stick together, and leave together. The guys may smile at you while their going up to get their drink, then they run back to their girlfriends. Who are hanging on to the bottom of their leg.
I say all this to say this. Everybody in LA is in these ridiculous long term relationships. I say ridiculous because some of the people who I see in long term relationships are quite ridiculous. Imagine seeing the weirdest sketchball guy ever in a department store, shopping, drueling at the mouth and you are totally afraid to go near him. He starts coming near you to ask you a question and you fear for your life. Now imagine yourself backing away and then his cute perfectly normal girlfriend comes upstairs and plants one straight on the mouth and they soon share a loving embrace, making you instantly wonder... what the hell did you wrong with your life?
Tammy and I always have this discussion when we go out. It's not necessarily about love. Love is a long shot. But we really cannot figure out what's wrong. We do not know why that we are the in-between relationship girl. The girl he needs to pass the time. Not the girl that the dude will eventually go running back to, but she won't take him back because she dumped him and has found someone better. We're the fun girl. We're also never the only girl.
I have a co-worker that just broke up with his girlfriend. I don't even think I like him, but yet I thought about pouncing on him solely because it's such a anomaly that he's single man.
Anyway, there will be a part two to this. I have more.
Anyway, there will be a part two to this.
Tuesday, May 03, 2011
The Boyfriend Girls
Oh, the ninth wonder of the world known as boyfriend girls. How I am forever fascinated by the boyfriend girls. I am surprised no one has written a damn song about the boyfriend girls. But maybe after this somebody will. I won't because I hate them. All.
What's a boyfriend girl?
A boyfriend girl is a girl that you either know or are associated with who is always in a relationship. You have no memory as to when she was not in relationship. One ends, there is always another poor soul waiting to pick up that slack. The guys they choose are always completely obsessed with them. They are usually characterized by the following traits: super prissy, often punctuating conversations with stories about their boyfriend, having no idea what it means to actually date or meet guys in a bar, never being worried or stressed due to the sex their having everyday, and the idea of having a "girls night out" being a science experiment to them.
May I present exhibit A:
She was born to have a boyfriend. When she broke up with Reggie Bush on her damn show all she did was whine about she's the single one and how weird it was for her. She also seems super uptight because she's completely uncomfortable making a fool of herself because she's never had to really develop a personality before. She just relied on the guy she was with to have one.
I, personally, am fascinated by these species of women for several reasons. I am fascinated by the fact that these boyfriend girls have the talent to sniff out the only decent, gainfully employed, available men on the planet and manage to make said men completely fall in love with them. And when the girl is ready to move on, they dump their men unceremoniously and completely ruin their self esteem. Resulting in turning these once great, ready for marriage, dependable, happy guys into woman hating players. These women either are born with or are taught the knowledge of how to get the man they want and how to make sure he will never get over them.
What is a non-boyfriend girl?
I am the opposite of a boyfriend girl. I believe at this point in my life, I am way, way too comfortable being by myself because I've done it for so long. I also, have quite a few friends, (classic trait of the non-boyfriend girl), so I have people in my life now who I can depend on if I really need them. Tricking myself into eliminating a need for a man in the process. Men like independent women, but you can only be independent to a certain extent. You have to really want that guy in your life.
Being a boyfriend girl isn't about looks. I know or know of a couple of women who aren't "conventionally" beautiful, who have completely ruined some men's lives. You may even say they were just really confident women. It's not always about confidence either, some may have been confident about what to do in their relationships, but not really much else outside of that. I truly just think you have it or you don't. You attract often or you attract less often. I also believe those books about flirting and sending signals are all a bunch of bullshit. They're just not enough single men out there to have a happy ending that way. Just basing that on numbers alone.
So if you're single right now and are interested in using your feminine wiles to attract your dream guy. Prepare to either be a home wrecker or a bedpost notch. Because that boyfriend girl he's got at home, is not letting him go out without a tracking device. Go for the nice guy that you don't really think is all that hot but is soo sweet, or the nice mailman who complements you everyday, or just be slut, guys like that too.
What's a boyfriend girl?
A boyfriend girl is a girl that you either know or are associated with who is always in a relationship. You have no memory as to when she was not in relationship. One ends, there is always another poor soul waiting to pick up that slack. The guys they choose are always completely obsessed with them. They are usually characterized by the following traits: super prissy, often punctuating conversations with stories about their boyfriend, having no idea what it means to actually date or meet guys in a bar, never being worried or stressed due to the sex their having everyday, and the idea of having a "girls night out" being a science experiment to them.
May I present exhibit A:
She was born to have a boyfriend. When she broke up with Reggie Bush on her damn show all she did was whine about she's the single one and how weird it was for her. She also seems super uptight because she's completely uncomfortable making a fool of herself because she's never had to really develop a personality before. She just relied on the guy she was with to have one.
I, personally, am fascinated by these species of women for several reasons. I am fascinated by the fact that these boyfriend girls have the talent to sniff out the only decent, gainfully employed, available men on the planet and manage to make said men completely fall in love with them. And when the girl is ready to move on, they dump their men unceremoniously and completely ruin their self esteem. Resulting in turning these once great, ready for marriage, dependable, happy guys into woman hating players. These women either are born with or are taught the knowledge of how to get the man they want and how to make sure he will never get over them.
What is a non-boyfriend girl?
I am the opposite of a boyfriend girl. I believe at this point in my life, I am way, way too comfortable being by myself because I've done it for so long. I also, have quite a few friends, (classic trait of the non-boyfriend girl), so I have people in my life now who I can depend on if I really need them. Tricking myself into eliminating a need for a man in the process. Men like independent women, but you can only be independent to a certain extent. You have to really want that guy in your life.
Being a boyfriend girl isn't about looks. I know or know of a couple of women who aren't "conventionally" beautiful, who have completely ruined some men's lives. You may even say they were just really confident women. It's not always about confidence either, some may have been confident about what to do in their relationships, but not really much else outside of that. I truly just think you have it or you don't. You attract often or you attract less often. I also believe those books about flirting and sending signals are all a bunch of bullshit. They're just not enough single men out there to have a happy ending that way. Just basing that on numbers alone.
So if you're single right now and are interested in using your feminine wiles to attract your dream guy. Prepare to either be a home wrecker or a bedpost notch. Because that boyfriend girl he's got at home, is not letting him go out without a tracking device. Go for the nice guy that you don't really think is all that hot but is soo sweet, or the nice mailman who complements you everyday, or just be slut, guys like that too.
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