Do you like the movie John Q..
I have noticed in my spotty at best dating record that you can eliminate a lot of unecessary people in your life by finding out if a person enjoyed the movie John Q. Let me explain my position on this, John Q is a movie starrring Denzel Washington, Robert Duvall, James Woods, Kimberly Elise and Ray Liotta that was in theatres in 2001. You would think that since Denzel is not only the lead, but is supported by a super-strong cast, and on top of that has a plot that the public can somewhat identify with (son cannot receive a heart transplant because the parents insurance will not cover the cost, so Denzel takes in law into his own hands, insert mean sounding revenge music here) that this would be at the very least a halfway decent film... Wrong, very wrong, this movie is bad. Unwatchable almost. But a lot of people are so blinded by Denzel being this martyr among black actors, that it actually comes out of a lot of people's mouths that this movie is good. I have actually heard more that one person say that the movie made them cry.
So I go back to the original question, what can you tell about a person who says that they enjoyed the movie John Q? Keep in mind that this theory is only valid in some cases, not all. Hell, you all may know some college professors and/or Rhodes Scholars who like John Q (I highly doubt it though.....)
1. They tend to be followers
This point goes back to my original argument, that Denzel is perceived as a martyr among black actors, or possibly a martyr among black men. When truth be told, Denzel sold out long time ago. With the exception of Training Day(garbage), and Man on Fire(crap) he has portrayed the same character in every single movie for the last ten years. Hell, even the guys he played in Man on Fire and Training Day can be first cousins.
2. They have no taste in movies
When someone tells me that they enjoyed John Q, I sometimes follow the question with another, Did you like Queen of the Damned? In my humble opinion, Queen of the Damned is literally the most horrible movie ever made. And as much as I love the late Aaliyah, and she is only in this movie for approximately 25 minutes. And no, she can't act.
3. They have bad taste in music
I know the two topics are unrelated but there are some people who like John Q, and those who own a Chingy CD, and listen to it frequently. There is a close correlation between people who like bad movies and bad music. Movies and music are both two of the highest forms of emotional release; nothing will take your mind off a bad day like a good movie or a good song. So if I had the shittiest day on earth and my man decides that he wants to cheer me up and rent Anchorman to make me laugh, I think at that exact moment, the relationship would be over for me.
Fortunately, there are exceptions to this rule, so don't completely rule out everyone who likes John Q or you would have no friends.
1. If they see John Q as a guilty pleasure
Guilty pleasures are fun, Cruel Intentions happens to be one of my favorite movies. Sometimes you just need something that is laughable bad to make you feel better. As your sitting there watching Showgirls, you will start thinking to yourself, as much as my life sucks right now, I did not get chosen to be in this movie.
2. It is counterbalanced by good movies
Okay, so they think that John Q is a good movie, but if you continue to pick their brain and you see that John Q is the anomaly on that list, sigh in relief. Just be aware that the person that you are speaking to has something very wrong with them that they are trying to hide.
Believe me, this is just a theory, a hypothesis. It has not been properly scientifically tested. But believe me when I do finally gather data, I'm applying for a patent because this shit is bulletproof.
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