What constitues the other woman?

What exactly are the qualities that are necessary to be the other woman? What qualities are needed to be the actual girlfriend as opposed to the other woman aka side dish, jump-off, bitch. I don't get it. I ask this question because I believe that I have the qualities to make to make a good girlfriend. I work hard, I have no kids, I am somewhat emotionally stable, and I am pretty non-confrontational. I want my Beyonce/Jay-Z moment in the sun, too.

I ask this question because I'll be honest, I've been the other woman a lot. Now I know that's trifing as hell, but none of these instances have been my fault. These men I thought were interested in getting to know me actually were only interested in something else, and they never told me that they have girlfriends at home.

I believe the beginning of the end for me was junior year of
college. I had a huge crush on this football player, one of the finest men I have ever seen in my life. So imagine how I felt, when he came over to the desk where I was working to talk to me for the first time. I was over the moon. He came over my room every night for a week to study and watch movies, slept in the same bed and we didn't have sex. Just hung out, it was fun. I thought he was really into me, until he stopped calling me and didn't return my calls. So here I am frantic, and I finally get in touch with him. He proceeds to tell me that the reason he has been avoiding me is because I'm selfish. Selfish? what! yeah, after that I decipher from his words that he's thinks I'm a tease. I'm not gonna lie, I wanted to sleep with him from jump, like I said he was fine, and I could have easily just said you know what don't bother calling ever. But that didn't happen...

I said to him okay. Come over now and I show you that I'm not selfish. Hence my very first booty call. I believe this exact moment that the switch was turned off in my brain that allowed me to have feelings for a guy before I sleep with him. A few twisted months, and booty calls later, I find out that he has had a girlfriend the whole time who I was told that I happen to look similar too. Damn.

Maybe that's it. My ex-boyfriend schooled me a lot before we broke up. Men can pick a freak out of a crowd, and why would they want a girlfriend when they can get just the sex and go home. Maybe its low self-esteem, maybe its high self-esteem, or maybe its just short hair and a big ass. Who knows.

I've always been very honest about how much I love sex, but it seems as if I have always been punished for it. Once the guy gets into his head, hey, she's not doing this just because I want too, she actually likes this. Its all downhill from there, "hey honey, lets go to the movies?" , "okay, I'll be over there midnight or later".