Laguna Beach

Its must be a sad, depressing time in my life that I am posting about Laguna Beach, but I am so bring on the zoloft.

For those of you who have a life, I'll give a brief synopsis as to what Laguna Beach is. Laguna Beach is a reality show on MTV about rich white high school kids who live in a picturesque town in Orange County. Its carries the tagline, the real Orange County. The show started as a love triangle between Stephen, Lauren-his best friend who wants him, and Kristen-the bitchy girl he's obsessed with. That was last season, this season the same storyline carries over but they have new characters. The new big story is Jessica, who is Kristen's best friend is dating Jason, the "bad boy" who could or could not be cheating on her with Alex. Alex and Jessica hate each other, and Jessica's friends keep telling her how stupid she is for being with Jason in the first place.

I hate myself a just a little more everytime I admit I watch this show.
My IQ points drop when I recite the plotlines.
I realize that I need to be committed when I admit I'm borderline obsessed.

These kids are in high school. Seniors in high school at that. That means they're 17-18. At this age, they have probably lived a life that far surpasses mine. This show also realize how much I hated high school. I mean I hated high school. If someone asked me what general time of in my life do I never talk about, I believe I would have to say high school. Its all black. Why do you ask? No one really liked me in high school. I'm suprisingly not bitter about that, its just the truth. With the exception of my best friend, moderntemptress over there, and one other girl you be hard pressed to find anyone in my graduating class who knows my name.

Before you ask, I wasn't a weirdo, at least I don't think I was; nor was I a bitch. Just quiet most of the time, and my parents were strict so I wasn't allowed to go out or date. That didn't help matters at all. In retrospect, maybe I was a little socially awkward...that and the girls at my all girls catholic school were bitches. I digress...

Like I was saying before, the main character Kristen, is a superbitch. I mean she was bitchy last season, but now she's unbearable. She's such a bitch that she only has ugly friends. You know those are the only type who can stand being around people like that. The last episode I saw, she took one of her especially unattractive friends to Dave and Buster's on the condition that she gets one guys' number. That was one of the saddest things I've ever seen on tv. You can tell that people in her that town look at her as Kristen's ugly friend. Her other friend, Jessica, the one who's dating the man whore, Jason, is not really ugly, but you can tell that when her and Kristen go out, all the cute men come up to Kristen instead of her. Been there.

STORY ALERT
STORY ALERT

The only place I really went out to in high school was the mall, and I went out with my friend Tamika. Tamika was one of those girls who always had a boyfriend. That bitch always had a boyfriend. But honestly, (Tamika, I love you girl) much like Kristen, she wasn't that cute, all the dudes just wanted her because she had really long hair and light eyes. Me at that time, with my super thick plastic glasses, unstylish and ugly boy clothes, didn't really fit me (can we say karl Kani?), my obivious overwhelming self-consciousness, no makeup skills as well as complete inability to flirt; its a wonder why they weren't lined up around the corner.

Well, how have things changed you ask?
1. I believe if I was in high school now I probably be fighting a lot.

2. Some advice for you low self-esteem girls, pulling a man has absolutely, repeat absolutely have nothing to do with looks. Once I figured that out, sex was a lot easier to get. Hell, I flipped off a "propositing gentleman caller" at the gas station this morning and I didn't even turn my head to look at him.

3. The best way to react to a bitch, is not to. Bitches are bitches because they thrive on getting a reaction out of you, and nothing pisses them off more when you're either not (a)listening to them or (b) so self-involved your damn self that you physically cannot pay attention to anyone else.

4. I get what my parents said about dating and going out being overrated its only truly fun when you're not supposed to be doing it.

and yes,

5. Me and Tamika went out again, about 2 years ago. I believe I got 4 numbers in a three hour time span as well, as one while sitting right next to her, hmm...how things change.