A while a ago I posted a blog stating things I have learned about myself and I would like to zero in on number 4 and number 18. Number 4 being, I am bitchy sometimes, and number 18 meaning that I understand why I am perceived as snobby. Sometimes, in life you come across people you just don't like, but I feel bad because I usually have a dislike for people who have done something to me. Well, there is a person who has done something too me, that I have had it out with, and eventually we forgave each other and moved on. Now when I said I moved on, my feelings were, "Hey, we're cool I can stay in the same room with you now but we ain't friends." I believe that her feelings were, "Yay, we were best friends we had an argument and now we're friends again. Let's skip into the sunset". I feel bad for being a total bitch to someone who is trying to be nice to me. But then again I don't because the minute I say something that she doesn't like, whether I am speaking to her or not, we'll have it out again. I apologize for rambling, but in a nutshell she's crazy.
I am also torn because I'm always the main person saying that black women are bitches to each other and we should complement and celebrate one another instead of hating all the time. And here's my hypocritical ass, physically turning my nose up at someone because deep down inside I don't feel that they're worthy or aligning themselves with me.
I'll never admit that out loud, though
I don't like her, she's crazy and I should not feel guilty about it. I know deep down inside that she really thinks I'm some conceited bitch who's only nice to people because she feels like she has to be. Oh, well, life throws us a bone sometimes.
Anyway, on to other topics, lately I've been obsessed with figuring out with people are gay or not. There's really nothing to do at my boring miserable job except look at celebrity gossip and comment on it like I really know these people, and I realized that a lot of people in the real world, not just Hollywood are bisexual or gay.
What started this self-realized gaydar obesssion is there is a new girl that I hired about two weeks ago, pretty girl, very feminine, about 19. She was calling a person who I thought seemed like her boyfriend to make bring her some food, and and the person who arrived was a very masculine looking girl with a Kool aid smile on her face carrying a box of KFC. I swear on the inside I was like 10-years-old going "oooooooooooooo".
I shudder to admit that the first thought that popped into my head was that she's too young to be gay, how ignorant is that? I'm a lot of things I admit, but close minded is not one of them. Its amazing how no one ever admits their true feelings about homosexuality until the actual homosexual act pushed right in the face. There was this girl who was a janitor on my floor who was let go because she was spending to much time with her boyfriend and her girlfriend on the clock. One would bring her lunch and the other would bring her dinner. Once again,"ooooooooo".
As far as the Hollywood gayday thing, here's my top 5 men in the closet.
1. Tom Cruise
2. Matthew McConahey(sp?)
3. Vin Diesel
4. Hayden Christensen (darth vader from star wars)
5. Jamie Foxx (he's bisexual, don't get mad at me)
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